Self-Gifting: What’s Your Opinion?

The post I recently put up about my “boyfriend gift” is creating quite a buzz, both in the comment section and with people I know. It turns out that there really is a wide range of emotions and stigma associated with a woman buying herself jewelry.

I started seeing this phenomenon early in my career as a personal shopper, when some of my clients were either very hesitant or would downright refuse to buy themselves jewelry. There wasn’t quite as big of an issue with less expensive, costume jewelry…but heck, throw a little diamond or ruby in there and suddenly it was a whole different ballgame.

Some women felt that all their “good” jewelry should come from their husbands or significant other. Another client stated that her husband would actually be upset if he saw her wearing something that he didn’t buy her. Really?! In the days where we can be the CEO of a company, run for office or single-handedly raise children, isn’t it OK to buy oneself something you love?

I would go as far as saying that buying yourself jewelry can actually be empowering. This is not to diminish the delight when receiving jewelry as a gift, of course, but it’s just totally different. I feel that being self-sufficient is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. Knowing that you can pay your rent, put food on the table, and even buy yourself some diamond hoops if you want them are all part of building one’s self-worth.

Ladies, I believe in you! And if you want to go buy yourself something sparkly, I applaud you!

How do you feel about self-gifting?

The “Boyfriend Gift”

Ok…so I’m faced with a jewelry shopping dilemma this holiday season. For countless years, I’ve been buying myself a “boyfriend gift” each Christmas. My rationale was that when the holiday rolled around and I didn’t have a boyfriend, the money I would have spent on him, I would in turn buy myself a gorgeous piece of jewelry. I mean really, why should I be punished by having no boyfriend and no beautiful jewelry?! Thus, my collection has been steadily growing.

Now, come Christmas 2011, I find myself with a boyfriend, but certainly not your average man, on any level. He is homeless by choice, doesn’t own a phone, he can fit his entire wardrobe into his 20 year old duffle bag, and we most certainly agreed not to exchange gifts. (Though he could use a new duffle bag…but that’s besides the point)

So here’s my question. I have the guy, but still will not be getting any sparkly present. Don’t I deserve one? Should I amend my rule and buy myself a boyfriend gift anyways this year? I’m curious what your opinion is — please share!

jeff
The boyfriend...